What do you do when life seems like an endless dessert?
What do you do when you feel like you are drowning in a see of hopelessness?
You try everything; But despite your hard work you still can’t seem to get ahead in life.
Heck your life seems like a mess and you’re feeling very stagnant,like your behind in life and pinned down.
You feel knocked down
What to do, what to do!
Now, most likely every single one of us have faced stagnation in life, almost all of us have felt like we are behind in life in some way, whether it is in your career, your business, your relationship etc. It is during these times that we try to stay positive and look at the brighter side of things. But no matter how positive your outlook may be on life you have to admit that sometimes life can be bleak and a nasty experience.
But one thing is for sure, no matter how big the challenge life throws at you is, you will always find your way out of stagnation.
This is why i’m sharing these amazing people with you today. Each one of them know very well the feeling of being behind in life and seeing their friends and family moving ahead of them in life.
But no, they’ve refused to let that keep them down.
They have proven that no matter how ugly life gets, you can fight back and punch life in the face and come out stronger then before. When asked the question how to stop feeling like one is behind in life? this is what they had to say:
“Minuca is a freelance writer that create expert roundups. Her posts provide quality content, bring huge traffic and get backlinks. She also helps bloggers connect with influencers. She is also the founder of minucaelena.com, her personal blog where she teaches strategies and give away free resources to grow your blog’s traffic “
You should stop comparing yourself with others. It’s no point feeling bad because other people have more money or are more successful than you are. You haven’t been in the circumstances in which they’ve been too.
You should compare yourself only with the person that you’ve been yesterday, or 5 months ago, or 1 year ago. Don’t take anything for granted. Experiment everything.
Usually, we make plans like if we do X action, we will get Y results, but sometimes things don’t happen that way. You can do all the right things and you don’t get the results that you expected. That’s why you should always have a backup plan and learn to adjust.
You should never fully depend on only one thing, even if it’s an income source or a person. You should rely on your skills and on the experience you earned.
“Laura and her husband Mark Tong started their blog to help people find happiness. She writes at her blog positivelyhappy.me and is part of the “Hope Effect” program for orphans. She also has been featured on many sites imcluding: the huffington posts, tiny buddha and goodlifezen.com”.
First up, it’s recognizing the triggers: planning too much, wanting to succeed too quickly and thinking everything I work on could be better.
They’re the main reasons I start thinking I’m behind in life because my imagination works faster than my logical and creative brain. Oh boy, that’s tiring. I have to stop and walk away, stop juggling and put all the projects in a drawer.
Then I ask myself one question: “Are you happy?” to which I always answer honestly ‘Yes’ and I remember that happiness is my goal so hey everything else is icing.
“Ana is a young and very driven 20-year-old UK lifestyle blogger, puppy lover and university student. On her blog thesheapproach.com she writes on topics ranging from motivation, fashion, starting a profitable blog, university life, woman empowerment and so much more.
“I was 18 when I had my first kiss. I was 19 when I first stepped foot out of the country I was born in. I was 20 when I got my first job.
By that point, I felt that everyone was experiencing life fully, while I was just testing the waters and barely dipping my toes in. I spent a lot of time thinking I was less of a person because the good things come slowly in my life. And everyone was always ten steps ahead.
But now I have a loving boyfriend. I am living in a foreign country and studying in a different language. I love my job and I am also a part time blogger.
The good things came softly in my life and now I am more thankful for them because of it. And I wouldn’t trade what it took and how long it took to get here for anything else.
It still strikes me sometimes, that other people who are maybe younger than me, are already ahead of the game (when it comes to career, blogging or relationships). And the truth is there is always going to be someone out there who did more than you did, and did it better than you ever will.
But then I remember that I am happy. And that my experience is unique.
So if you’re thinking that you’ll never catch up to those people, don’t! You are on a totally different path. Stick to what you know and love.
Comparing yourself with others will not help you. And it’s beyond unfair. Because you didn’t start the same. And you are fundamentally not the same as them.
Learn from other if you can. Admire what they did right and avoid what they did wrong. But whatever you do, do not compare yourself with them!
Do no spend your life trying to catch up to others. Rather than that, just try to outdo yourself.”
“Liz is a yoga teacher, reiki healer and blogger at SpiritSpur.com. She writes for women who wants break free from the stress cycle. She blends her experience as a certified yoga teacher, reiki level II energy healer and professional storyteller to create empowering, uplifting experiences for women who crave a sense of peace and harmony in their lives”.
Feeling behind comes from worry about the past or future and attachment to expectations. The best way to avoid suffering as a result of past regrets or anxiety about an uncertain future is by living in the now. When you fully embrace the present moment, there is no past or future, or the associated worries. This is what athletes and warriors refer to as the zone, and creative artists and performers call flow.
Moving through yoga poses with complete focus on the breath is a great way to ease into living your full life in flow. Of course, no one lives in this state every moment. With practice, though, you can catch yourself when you start to slip down the rabbit hole of worry and mindfully bring yourself back to the present moment.
Trying to live up to expectations of others or putting pressure on yourself to fulfill a pre-packaged version of success sets you up for disappointment. Instead, try to trust that you are exactly where you need to be in life. You are following your own path, perhaps a winding one, that is as unique as you. Look for the lessons life has to offer in its challenges and setbacks and shine the light of appreciation on your current life. If you are breathing, you have something for which to be grateful, even when the life’s not coming up roses per your expectations. Celebrate in gratitude the fullness of your life in this moment.
Journal writing can bring conscious awareness to whether you are living true to yourself and can help cultivate gratitude. Consider listing three things you are grateful for each day. Explore what expectations you hold for your life and what expectations you perceive that others hold. Expressing your thoughts and feelings on paper can bring a certain light and distance that invite fresh perspective. Take this opportunity to make a shift in your mindset and your life’s path forward.
“Kirstie is a blogger and founder of enlightenmentforschukcs.com . Kirstie writes about all things spiritual. She started her spiritual journey when she one day read the book a course in miracles, this book inspired her so much that she went to read the places that scare you, the power of now and many more. She saw gradual change in her life and now has her own book on amazon.com called traveling towards enlightenment“.
I was middle-aged when I left my 9-5 job to dream-chase, so approaching life with a new definition of success that defied worldly expectations was vital. I had the choice to look at my life and say, “this is not where I want to be” or to say “this is where I am going.” Whenever I get down about not being as far along as I’d like to be, I remind myself how courageous it was to make that first choice to leave behind the life that I did not want. After all, there’s little safety in dream chasing, just lots of adventure.:-)
My number one motivator to keep looking forward is, ironically, to take stock of everything I’ve already learned and accomplished. Then I celebrate it. Becoming my number 1 fan has made all the difference: I do arm pumps and self-hugs of excitement all the time for myself.
I surround myself with like-minded writers and artists who help uplift me. And every once in a while I pull up that first Blog To Do List that I ever made just to marvel at how far I’ve come. Nobody else is ever going to know the loads of sacrifices you’ve make to get through those lists and reach your goals, so nobody else gets to define what success looks like for you.
“Trina is a an ambitious writer and blogger. She blogs atenlightenmentforschmucks.com. Trina is a gifted poet who at age 17 won a prom poetry contest. Her poem was later published in The World’s Most Treasured Poems. She went on to write her very first book “roadtripping the dream’ and self published it in december 2012. She is now in the midst of completing her second book”.
I used to dwell on this very situation. But when I really looked at my life, the moments I thought were diversions, were actually part of the bigger plan. T
These were merely rest stops for learning along the highway of life. If I hadn’t learned a particular lesson, I would get a U-turn and travel that road again, in the form of another relationship that was slightly different, but dealt with the same issues about how I should value myself, or get my voice back.
When I learned that lesson, out of nowhere a new avenue would open up to me that was not there before. I had to learn to get out of my own way, because no one was causing the traffic jam in my life but me.
Dani is an author, blogger, and designer. In 2009, she launched PositivelyPresent.com as a way to share her personal experiences and insights on positivity, awareness, and self-love — things that didn’t always come easy to her! and author to many books including : Stay Positive, The Positively Present Guide to Life, a variety of e-books and many more.
When you feel as if you’re behind in life, the best thing you can do is focus on the present moment. When you’re doing that, you’re not comparing yourself to others (or to where you think you should be).
Instead, you’re in the now, directing your attention to what you can do in this specific moment to get to where you want to be in the future. Also, it’s important to show yourself love and treat yourself with kindness!
“Alyssa Kleinman is a freelance writer, mother and a tech geek. Together with her husband Reed Kleinman they started their website smarthomesolver.com , where they review and compare home automation systems for their readers. Their first priority is explaining simple home automation systems that can make your life easier”.
It’s easy to get discouraged with life. I remember one day earlier this year I felt so tired realizing that my hard efforts were all going into some invisible piggy bank. I was running six days a week to get in shape, growing a freelance writing business, and working long hours at night to bring traffic to my new blog.
Of course I was also a mom to a rambunctious toddler. But at the end of each day, I was exhausted, made very little money from my blog, and still wasn’t much faster than the day I started running.
What helped during these few months was focusing on small accomplishments. I wasn’t running a 7 minute mile like I wanted to, but at least my mile was getting faster and I wasn’t still sitting on the couch watching Netflix.
My blog wasn’t earning as much as I wanted, but my articles were starting to rank in Google, which was encouraging. Instead of feeling sorry for myself because everyone else was beating me to the finish line, I just focused on putting one foot in front of another in every part of my life.
Now, I still haven’t given up on running or writing. My mile isn’t 7 minutes, but it’s getting close. My blog hasn’t gone viral, but it brought in hundreds of dollars last month. People always say that growing a blog is a marathon, not a sprint. If that’s true, it’s all about thinking positive and focusing on what you can do today to make tiny improvements.
“D.R is the founder of thinkingevolution.com. He has a special way of bringing his message to the world and that is by 100% focusing solely on his message and not on him. Getting his name “known” around the world is far from what he hopes to achieve on Thinking Evolution. Instead he wants to create a community where he and his readers can exchange ideas about love, beliefs and everything else they hold dear”.
We seem to have a rather obsessive nature in life to be considered the “best” or “superior.” This makes us feel powerful, and in turn feel good. We strive to find this point, this “perfect scenario” for we are sure this should make us feel almost a form of relief. This obsessive nature is something woven into many aspects of modern society, from the things that provide us nothing more than instant gratification to the problems we have with choices. or more importantly the way we judge our choices.
We tend to judge our choices (whether we want to make them or not) through how much closer to that “perfect scenario” it can bring us. Furthermore we see other people’s lives and the decisions they are making, convinced for some reason that what they are doing is better, bringing them closer to that “better” life, that “happier”way of living we all desire in one way or another. Its as if we have become very self-conscious, worried more about how well everyone else is doing because we are so convinced that its so much better than us.
In many ways this can stop us making decisions, convincing ourselves that “this is alright” or “this is enough.” Its a shame that we limit ourselves like this, because we spend so much of our time confident we will always be behind everyone else, that what we do will never work as well, it can mean we end up missing out on something outstanding, those uniquely powerful moments that make us feel like nothing else can.
For surely this should be living, to understand and respect that we have a choice, to see and feel things the way we want to, regardless of what everyone else is doing.
“Izuzu is an inspirational, young and ambitious blogger who blogs at positivevoiceblog.com a blog she founded. Her mission is to take all of her readers on a journey to achieve personal greatness. Through her blog she wants to inspire people to always stay positive and optimistic. Izuzu is also a firm believer in self and is very determined”.
“Every flower blooms at its own pace” – Suzy Kassem. When we plant flowers, we discover that they do not all bloom at the same time. The same applies to humans. It’s so easy to think that we’re years behind in life especially when we constantly review the lives of our friends and colleagues on social media or the world around us.
We make comparisons without realizing that we’re different, unique and have the different gifts, talents and abilities. We are unique in the sense that we are on different routes in life, probably a road less traveled. Even if it isn’t a road less traveled, you’re still on your own path in life.
You’re exactly where you need to be it’s just a matter of time, patience, hard work and determination before you’d reach your life goals. In the meantime, be present, focus on this moment, enjoy this moment, and enjoy the processes you take to achieve your goals, be happy. Life is like driving.
If you take your eyes off the road ahead and focus on another driver, you’ll definitely miss out and crash into something. What to do instead. Set your goals: It might take a short or a long time to reach your life goals but don’t forget to celebrate and enjoy your little steps of progress. This will surely keep you motivated. · Avoid comparing your life or achievements in life to others: Focus on your own path in life and focus on how to reach your life’s goals. Your friends and colleagues may achieve great things in life before you do. Never let that bother you. Just keep doing what you’re doing.
Always remember these laws:: 1. Law of substitution: You can only hold one thought at a time, positive or negative. You can substitute negative with positive whenever you choose and vice versa. (feeling that you’re behind in life is a negative feeling, consider substituting it with a positive thought)
2. Law of habit: Any thought or action you repeat over and over eventually becomes a habit. (Make it a habit to be always appreciate yourself be grateful for all that you have).
“Stephen guise is a motivational blogger, founder of the stephenguise.com and author of many books including his international best-selling book detailing the strategy that has changed thousands of lives including his; and his latest highly-rated book How to Be an Imperfectionist gives you 20+ creative mini habit solutions to overcome perfectionism and get things done”!
The best way to stop feeling like you’re behind is to realize that you’re better off believing you’re neutral or even ahead. The reason we live like we’re behind is because we think it will help us catch up, when in reality, it often puts us further behind. As I stated in the article, the fundamentals of success don’t change just because you’re behind.
Most people think falling behind is a special circumstance that requires a different-than-usual response. They’re wrong.
This isn’t to say we should deny the reality of our situations, it’s to suggest that we strategically choose our reaction when we are behind.
Instead of living from behind, let’s live as if any and every move forward puts us ahead. This is factually true, because every move forward puts you ahead of where you just were. And the true measure of success is not how you measure up to an arbitrary goal that you or society has set, it’s how you measure up to who you were the very moment before this one. If you’re any amount smarter, wiser, faster, stronger, better or further along than you were last minute, you’re succeeding!
The fundamentals of successful living? Frequently use small steps to move forward and create momentum, be consistent in key areas to build good habits that will compound, and value forward progress in any amount. If you can focus on those regardless of the circumstances, results, peaks, and valleys in your life, you will continuously improve your life and get wins.
“Jesi is the founder of uprisingwellness.com and blogs frequently about fitness, nutrition, & overall wellness. Through her blog she strives to empower women to promote self-care & have healthier, happier families as a result”.
One of the biggest obstacles we face is our own mindset.
We’ve been told that we need to take care of everyone else and that it’s necessary to put ourselves last.
On top of that, we have a barrage of negative internal dialogue running through our heads. Constantly comparing ourselves to others and berating our shortfalls.
To overcome this, you need to realized how important you are at the moment.
Rationalizing that you’re important because someone else says so is different from realizing it for yourself.
A positive mindset can have very powerful effects on your everyday life and even your health.
In fact, there is a ton of research on the power of a positive mindset. In fact it’s been found that those with a positive mindset are more likely to flourish in life.
And those that have a positive outlook with a tendency to look for solutions to obstacles are more likely to have better health outcomes.
If you’re not naturally a positive thinker there is hope. You can actually train yourself to become more positive.
When something goes wrong (and it inevitably will) if your first thought is negative you need to stop that thought and morph it into a more positive one. Then, you need to think the problem through and find a solution.
Realize that most things aren’t the end of the world and you can get through it.
Which brings us to the next point, you are capable of so much more than you think. Realizing this can help get you through tough times.
What happens when you face obstacles in life? Do you find a way to keep moving forward or do you just throw in the towel?
As long as you keep moving forward you have success, not failure.
You see, failure doesn’t really exist. At least, not in the little small ways we tend to think of as failure. A slip up is merely that as long as we keep moving forward.
Maybe life has slipped by and your health & wellness has been shoved to the backburner.
That’s not necessarily a failure.
Obviously you’re looking at this article right now. That’s a small success.
Why? Because it means that it’s still on your mind. You’re still looking to find a solution.
You just need to take the next step and start moving forward.
Stop beating yourself up over the past.
“Aaron Resid is an aspiring up and coming blogger who has a deep rooted interest in the meaning of live and the beautiful things life bring with it. He is also very much interested in self development, self love and spirituality. Aaron often expresses himself in writing on his fb page(for now) to his many followers where you’ll be sure to find him”.
Thinking and feeling you are behind in life is a problem for many, including myself. We can spend a life time feeling we are out of touch and not living up to the expectations we set ourselves.
I want to urge you to drop your expectations of yourself and drop the expectations that others have set for you. Change the expectations you have on yourself and swap it for motivation in the present moment. When you fully live in the present moment you don’t need to worry about being behind or in front in life as you will notice there is no such thing.
You can begin now to feel healthy and prosperous. Take a walk and have a conversation with yourself. By an apple and enjoy its juices!Smile to yourself. Its very easy when you have a few down days to get stuck in that mentality, and never feel you can leave and then fall into the rut of depression. You can actually get addicted to a certain kind of sadness, and this addiction can have you trapped. All you need is a wake up call and a shift of your current thinking habits.
Write to yourself everyday. Do something out of the ordinary, most people problem is that they take themselves to seriously, when your having a negative thought laugh at yourself before you let it lead to the next, before you know it you will be creating totally new neural pathways. It is said that to be great at something you have to do it around 1000 times. So start now.
Who cares if it takes 3 years of practice when for the rest of your life could be bliss. Beat depression with repetition. Start now, our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate, our greatest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure, to be powerful we have to become strong and driven, let your vision of a better future be your drive.
Don’t wait for a miracle, miracles are created by God, be your own God and create the miracles you want to see in your life. You are the creator, never forget that, you were created to create. In this life you have to wake up and realise that you are truly alone and because we are all alone we are all together, thats the catch, so in reality no-one is alone. Talk to your friends and family about how your feeling, be honest and ask for there advice. Write there advice down and stick it on a wall.
Love yourself as a friend, and tell yourself that you love you. Be motivated for the present moment thats my main advice, drop expectations, when you stop expecting you can never be disappointed.
Thanks so much to all the inspirational bloggers and online marketers that contributed to this expert roundup!
Let me know in the comments below if you ever felt like you were behind in life and how did you tackle this feeling?